Flashback: To strolling through the streets of London in 2015. But the photo isn’t as important as the feeling I had when I took it…
See, this was the first time I’d been back to England since living there in 2001. The reason why this picture means something to me is because of what it represents. My dream had been to live abroad. And I made that dream come true. In 2001, I had my visa, my living arrangements sorted, my money saved, my heart set. I bought a one-way ticket because I was so clear about staying there for good. When I left to come back to the states in 2002, it was not a happy decision. It’s not that I had failed or given up…it’s that I was young and decided that a relationship back in the US was more important than my dreams. When I moved home, I was not greeted with the happy ending I had been pining for–the relationship fell apart almost as soon as I got back. And so there I was, in Nashville. Confused and full of regrets. “I wish I would have made a different choice.” I tried to make Nashville work, but I always quietly longed for my home abroad. I always missed England. It was the only place that actually felt like “home” to me. •
Flash forward 15 years. 15 YEARS YALL. After more than a decade of longing for travel, I finally decided to PRIORITIZE IT NO MATTER WHAT. Even though I didn’t “have” the money. Even though I couldn’t “afford” the time off work. When I took this photo, I was breathing a sigh of proud relief, taking in the colors and the lights and the sounds of the night traffic, thinking “I did it. I made it. I got myself back.” I worked my ass off making this trip happen. I manifested shit out of thin air to get the money. And it taught me so much about the power of my own intention. •
The longing to go back wasn’t enough. The regrets weren’t enough. I had to make definite plans, set a clear intention, backed by a definite desire, with persistence to do it this time. See, the contrast of that “lost” Dream lead me to my clarity. And now I’m traveling all over the world, making my dreams come true again….and this trip in 2015 was a turning point on my journey.
I hope this inspires someone, somewhere reading this in some way too.💞
Reawaken a dream
April 28, 2017